Merry Christmas, everyone! Today we celebrate the birth of the sun god at the turning of the season, the winter solstice!

I'm sad now that I've been so neglectful of decorating. There's not a thing here in the apartment to show it's christmas. I guess to me the holiday has never had much meaning, except to be with family and friends. But still it feels that something is missing from the place, if only something to show that these few days are somehow different. To mark the time.

I think maybe it's just the fact that I didn't do anything more than the lack of the thing not done that's more depressing. The fact that work is somehow more important than a celebration of...well of whatever it is that we're celebrating. The fact that I don't really believe that there's anything to celebrate today. Nothing special.

I mean "friends and family" is one thing, but compared to a belief that some god died for you today...not quite as rousing. Today, organized religion has her revenge on me. And those that believe in (or at least blindly follow) her flaunt their sparkly wealth; they hang it from every eve and bough. But what are these ornaments to me, but the tortures of Tantalus, who ever grabs with desire at what he knows he cannot have. Spirituality has robbed me of faith.

I guess I have to take solace in the act of choice, and in the hope of an open mind.