It seems once again that the good readers of von Mustard's scrawl have been mislead by that drunken pied piper. And, once again I, Professor Doctor Justin Davenport the third, must put aside my daily scientific research to affect their Intellectual Rescue.

Mustard argues that the selling of many and assorted knives of random quality, size, &cetera is a greate EVIL, and a sign of our undoing. But he is wrong; as I will endeavor to shew, it is a reflection of our truest, oldest natures, and a necessity to the very survival of our society.

My good friends, has it not been said oftentimes, and also proven to be true by history that in the Land of the Blind, the One-Eyes would be Kings? In truth, if a cat were to be robbed of Nature's own gifts of claw and fang, would she not perish quickly in her bitter home of the wild, so filled with predators of dyvers shape and syze?

Be ye not fooled, then, gentle reader! For the wilderness of Florida, or of the WORLD AT LARGE is no less fraught with peril! And only those of us with claw and nail ever at the ready will survive! Robbed of our arms, our might would be easily crested by the merest foe!

Now, GOD in his most Compleat Wisdom, has not seen fit to arm us with those literal weapons which other creatures of this wilderness do posses, nor are our foes in these days of city-state likely to be armed in this way. HE has, however, given to us a much more potent WEAPON, which we all may use for either GOOD or ILL, depending on the nature of our HUMORS. This mighty weapon of which I speak is our CUNNING. And tho there be many pious and good persons in this world, it must be seen to be true that the world in moiety is a WICKED place nonetheless, and we must perforce protect ourselves and our PROPERTY from those intent to do us ILL by those means previously mentioned.

The only safe society, gentle readers, is a society ARMED with POINTED OBJECTS! For the state of War between Each and Every Man surely boils beneath the thin surface of the Social Contract, and by means of our CUNNING we are made equals, and thus equally dangerous to one another! Think not that those who, by mischance or misdeed, have LESS than you do not COVET and SCHEME to take what is yours? Or that those, like even von Mustard himself, who seem to have all do not yet, in their infinite GREED require MORE? Think not that they have the same MEANS to achieve their ends that have you to DEFEAT them?

Then, seeing this wisdom, we must turn a deaf ear to the voices of those who would use their ARTIFICE and GUILE to DISARM us, and so make us weak. To arms, readers! Uphold your God-given right to protect that which is yours with POINTY OBJECTS!