So... what's with navel lint here in this country? I've never had even one iota of lint in my innie, but now, every morning I've got a veritable whoville in there. Mysteries of the unexplained.

I cannot stop reading online comics. If anyone wants to know what I've been doing here in Japan... reading online comics. I'll post all of 'em here in a day or two.

Hmmm.. my big polemic. I pretty much decided to only stay here a year, but... today one of my teachers was all "I wish you would stay blah blah kids really love you, etc..." and another at the other school said the same. The way to my heart is through my ego. Or through a vein. That works, too.

I don't even know if it would be POSSIBLE, let alone right. I mean I already feel selfish about this... this whatever it is that this is here. [ Okay, from here we have to go into "Fiddler on the Roof" decision mode. Remember "tradition!"? ] On the one hand, I've put burdens on my friends and family, ditched responsibilities and generally tugged at everyones sleeves just to get here. And to what end? Nothing surely in the way of career. If anything this was a step back or at least off to the side.

On the other hand, to what end has my "career" been aimed? Am I happier now? I feel honestly (foolishly?) that I'm positively effecting some cool kids, and unlike a lot of JETs I feel I have a real say and a real responsibility. Plus in a day to day way, I'm learning to tug on a whole new set of ropes. All those day to day challenges are getting easier, if I stay I could benifit from all that hard work and anxiety.

On the other hand, I came here to be afraid and anxious. To steer my course towards the dragons on the edge of the map. Task done. Territory charted. Or is it? Or should it be? Or if so, then what? Or how can I even know? The more the problem is examined, the more it (fractal-like? Shroedinger's cat like?) changes, becomes more complex. Develops paradox. This just means that good, crunchy truths lie within and that it is a question worth asking.

"I can't go on. I'll go on." --Beckett.